Faith Alone Read online

  With sarcasm, I asked, as she rolled out of the bed, “Have you seen a doctor about that? It sounds like it’s getting worse.”

  “Bye Felecia,” she said before retreating to her bedroom.

  I cracked up for the first time in days. It was one twenty in the morning. My twelve-week sonogram was tomorrow and I’d go to work afterward. Sleep, please be my friend.

  I flipped through the channels. Seth Myers’s show went off and Carson Daly’s voice filled my room. Uhmm, maybe I’ll go to the DVR. Wendy Williams, the View or Ellen? Uhm, no exciting guests.

  I pushed myself out of the bed and walked across the room to the dresser to get the laptop. I decided to take a look at the MGM Resort to see if there were any special events scheduled for the weekend we were going. The rooms looked spacious, there were a variety of restaurants and Sinbad was the featured entertainment during our staycation weekend. The comedy show might be fun.

  I woke up with the laptop still open but it was only three forty in the morning. A little over an hour of sleep. Should I mark that as an accomplishment or a fail? I chuckled, but it wasn’t funny; these sleepless nights were back with a vengeance.

  Losing sleep because of the ultrasound was not doing me any good. Tracy and I called these sonograms ‘peace-of-mind’ appointments. But my mind kept going to crazy thoughts: would we hear a heartbeat? Would I pee on the table after drinking all the water? Again, would we hear a heartbeat?

  These appointments induced stress. The first trimester down, two more to go. Only. Two. Since my body didn’t feel another round of sleep coming, I googled ‘the first trimester of pregnancy.’

  I saw a picture of a little fetus with the following description: ‘The first trimester is the most critical time of your pregnancy. Although the fetus at the end of three months is only about four inches long and weighs less than 1 ounce, all of its functions have begun to form — major organs and nervous system, heartbeat, arms, fingers, legs, toes, hair, and buds for future teeth.’

  Rolling over onto my side, I caressed my tummy. Taking slow breaths, willing myself to sleep, I wished Brian was here to hold me, kiss me and love me.

  When my eyes opened again, it was only five fifteen. Another sleepless night. The first metro bus would stop at the corner in thirty minutes, and my alarm would ring an hour later.

  The alarm buzzed and I slapped at it a few times before shutting it off. The cruelest part was that it felt like I fell asleep only twenty minutes ago.

  Although the sheets were warm and called my name, I threw them back and willed my feet to the floor. They obeyed.

  As if on cue, Vanessa yelled from downstairs, “Are you up? I’m making breakfast.”

  Vanessa loved to cook and breakfast was her favorite. A rich, warm cup of coffee might help wake me. I showered, pulled clothes from the closet and dressed. The smell of frying bacon hit my nose as I walked down the stairs, followed by Vanessa’s cheerful voice.

  “Good morning Sunshine,” she greeted me as she took the bacon out of the frying pan. Holding the plate up, with a grin and widened eyes, she invited me to eat.

  “I’ll put some bacon on toast with an egg.”

  She grabbed a dishcloth, wiped the pan, grabbed two eggs from the refrigerator and asked, “Scrambled?”

  “Yepper.” I liked having Vanessa here. She spoiled me, not like Brian did, but in a sister kind of way.

  I picked up the tea that she poured but had to steady the cup with my left hand because my hands were shaking. I rushed to put the mug down before Vanessa noticed. I was too late. Her eyes were fixated on my hands.

  She didn’t say anything, just laid the food down and asked, “Do we have time to eat here or should I wrap it up to go?”

  The appointment wasn’t until nine o’clock, and it was only seven fifty-five.

  “Uhmm, if we leave no later than eight twenty, even in rush hour traffic, we should arrive at eight fifty. We can eat now.”

  After fixing her B-L-T sandwich, she joined me at the dining room table. “I’ll say grace.”

  We bowed our heads, and when she prayed, I knew why she didn’t say anything to me about my nervousness. She took it to God.

  “Father God, we come before you to thank you for everything that you have done for us. Even in the midst of what appears to be chaos we know you are our Jehovah-Jireh, our provider. We ask that you rain down peace on us today as we go and check on our little baby. We ask that you guide the hands of the technicians who will oversee the ultrasound. We ask that you send angels to watch over our baby to ensure that every limb grows healthy.”

  At this point, tears streamed down my face, but I was able to whisper an occasional, “Yes Lord.”

  Bringing the prayer to a close, Vanessa exclaimed, “Please bless our food that it may provide us with the nourishment that we need to begin our day. We give you all the glory and all the honor. We ask these and all blessings in the name of your Son, Jesus Christ, the Lord. Amen.”

  “Amen.”

  I didn’t have to tell Vanessa what I needed, she knew. After breathing in and out and wiping my face, I told Vanessa, “Thank you.”

  Reaching across the table for my hands, she repeated my favorite line from the movie Soul Food. Vivica Fox told Nia Long, during the wedding reception scene, “You my sister gurl and I love you.”

  After we ate, it was time to leave. Vanessa drove, and we got there in record time.

  Thankfully, I was their first appointment. The technician with a bright smile introduced herself as Ms. Lori Woods. She was younger than I anticipated but professional. I loved her neatly kept locs that fell down her back. I introduced Vanessa as my best friend and part of my village.

  “It’s nice meeting you. The village is important.”

  We followed her down a short hallway to the room. Once we entered, the brightness of the walls spoke to my spirit, and my heart beat slowed down, a little.

  “You can lay here for me.” Pulling a chair closer to the examination table, she told Vanessa, “You can sit here if you like.”

  “Oh, thank you. I appreciate it.”

  “No problem. I’ll leave you now. Oh, let me give you this cloth to put over your tummy until I get back; don’t want you getting cool.”

  She left the room, and I sat on the table, and then rolled my legs over onto it. I wore stretch pants with a cute top, so it was easy to roll them down below my belly.

  “This is my first time seeing a sonogram live and in living color.” Vanessa gazed at the pictures on the wall as she spoke. Then she turned around. “And I’m glad it’s with you.” She reached down and hugged me before sitting.

  “I’m glad you’re here, too.”

  We heard a light tap on the door.

  “Come on in.”

  “Hello again. So, are you ready to see your baby and hear the heartbeat?” Ms. Lori grabbed the scanner in one hand and the gel in the other which was cold when it hit my stomach. She began rolling the scanner over the gel, spreading it as she went. The room was quiet except for the crackling sound coming from the machine.

  We heard nothing. Ms. Lori’s voice was optimistic. “I think your baby may be hiding from us. Can you roll over on your side?”

  “Either side?” I asked. “Yes.”

  I chose the side that had my back to the machine. I didn’t want to look at it.

  Vanessa eased her hand into mine.

  Ms. Lori continued to roll the scanner over my belly. Nothing. Nada.

  Vanessa squeezed my hand.

  As she tried to keep a poker face, I saw the concern in Ms. Lori’s eyes, but she attempted to reassure me with a tender grin.

  Boom. We heard rapid beats from the machine.

  “There’s our baby.” Ms. Lori beamed.

  Vanessa let out a sigh of relief.

  “Thank you, Jesus.” I prayed as tears of joy trickled down my face.

  “I’ll take a few pictures and then send everything to Dr. Price for her review. But trust me, everyt
hing looks good. The receptionist will schedule your follow-up appointment.”

  Breathe in. Breathe out.

  “Thank you, Ms. Lori. You have the best demeanor for this job. I hope I get you when I come back.”

  Standing near the door, she responded. “I’d love to follow your pregnancy journey. Just verify that I’m in the office on the day of your next sonogram and I’ll make sure I see you again.”

  Reaching my hand out, she stepped forward and enclosed it with both of her hands.

  “It was nice meeting you ladies today.”

  Before she left, she gave me cloths to clean up the gel.

  Vanessa helped me off the table.

  “Now we can go on our staycation with a peace of mind, right?” Her question was more of a statement. “Staycation, here we come!”

  Chapter 17

  Within the next three weeks, I went from throwing up every morning to being able to eat whatever I wanted, when I wanted. Foreign smells didn’t drive me running to the bathroom, face down in the toilet anymore. For this, I was ecstatic. I was finally through the first trimester of the pregnancy, and I felt a small sense of relief.

  Keyword: small.

  We anticipated this weekend, and I was ready to go to see if the hotel lived up to the hype.

  MGM Casino and Resort was about three miles outside of D.C. But Tracy, rented a limousine to take us.

  “We deserve it.” she retorted when she showed up at my house to pick us up.

  “I’m wit’ it.” Vanessa happily gave the driver her bags. “Do we have to chip in?”

  “Vanessa, I don’t do business like that. I’m paying. If I expected anyone else to contribute funds, I would’ve asked before I rented it. Get in. Let’s go.” Tracy commanded.

  Sliding into the car, I prepared myself for the turn-up. I deserved it.

  “Ladies, are you ready?” our driver asked. “We are more than ready.” I responded.

  My girls smiled. I was hesitant when Tracy first mentioned the trip. Now that my morning sickness is over, I felt comfortable going out. Besides, rest and relaxation were calling.

  I couldn’t contain the excitement in my voice. “What happens at the MGM, stays at the MGM. Now let’s bust open a can of Sprite.” The driver pulled away from the curb.

  Vanessa and Tracy broke out in laughter.

  As we rode down route 295 south, I couldn’t believe the sight in front of us. The MGM was as tall and gorgeous as any Las Vegas resort. The bronze, all glass casino, and resort was a welcomed addition to the area. Other hotels had opened in the area within the last five years. But, the MGM was sure to draw tourists because now East coasters wouldn’t have to fly across the country to Vegas to stay at a hallmark MGM resort.

  Brian and I had looked forward to coming here to enjoy the restaurants, the shops, and the shows. We’d viewed it online as they built the entertainment complex.

  Rounding the curb, we saw the sign pointing to the Tanger Outlets.

  “I might have to sneak away and get my shopping on. I read that the resort has complimentary shuttle service to the outlets.” Vanessa said, verifying that she knew the location of the outlets in proximity to the hotel.

  “Y’all can keep that outlet shopping for yourselves. I’ll be at the MCM shop picking me up something cute.” Tracy said as she slid her glasses on.

  “Okay, so do you teach a finance class? If so, I need to register.” Vanessa laughed as she raised her hand for me to give her a high-five. “Tracy you set it out this weekend with the limo and the room. Now you talking about buying from the MCM shop.”

  We slapped hands while Tracy retorted. “Don’t hate the playa.”

  As we pulled into the circular driveway, the iconic, large gold lions greeted us. The online pictures didn’t do the MGM National Harbor justice. It was grand in size and architecture; no resort in the area could compare to its stature. This was what the region anticipated and deserved.

  We were greeted with ice cold water as we walked into the lobby. “Yasss, honey, yasss.” Tracy exclaimed after taking one sip.

  “Okay, so the east coast is trying to rival the west coast. This is grander than the MGM Grand in Vegas.” Vanessa noted.

  “I’ll go and check us in; be right back.” Tracy switched her hips toward the reservation desk. Although the lobby was bustling with people, she caught the eyes of a few admirers.

  As Vanessa and I sat in the lobby, I noticed the opulence. The orange, green and brown humongous light fixture hanging from the ceiling resembled something out of Star Wars. Everything was so plush, brand new. Yes. We would enjoy this.

  As we rode the glass elevator to the nineteenth floor, the people got smaller and smaller, the higher we went.

  Tracy used her key to open the door to our home for the weekend. She sashayed into the suite, twirled around and threw her hands out to her sides. “Chicas, what do you think?”

  The Capital suite was da bomb. The first thing that took my breath away was the floor to ceiling windows with picturesque views of the Potomac River. In the far distance, I saw planes landing at the Ronald Reagan National Airport. The smell of mahogany caught my nose as I walked toward the work desk. The colors were vibrant, the same as the lobby.

  There were two bedrooms. “Lachelle and Vanessa, I’ll take this bedroom. I’m sure you all want to catch up on sorority stuff.” Tracy kicked off her shoes and buried her toes into the animal skin rug.

  After we took our bags to our room, we met up in the living room.

  “Thank you for setting up this weekend. I’m glad that we could do this before I had to go back home. Spending time with you guys is important to me and…”

  Tracy interrupted Vanessa. “Enough of that mushy stuff.

  Let’s hit these MGM streets.”

  To make the most of our four days, each of us picked an activity to do that all of us would participate in. Vanessa chose the spa day. The robes were luxurious, and the services were blissful. Even though I didn’t get a massage, I met the girls in the manicure/pedicure room dressed as though I did. I chose the comedy show featuring Sinbad.

  “It’s Saturday night, and I’m warning both of you, I’m putting on my freak ‘em dress.” Vanessa wrapped her hair up in her signature ponytail.

  “You put on your freak ‘em dress. I’m putting on my black leather shorts.” Tracy told us with a smirk that said your dress won’t touch my shorts.

  Tracy loved sports, so she chose to spend the last night at the sports bar watching a pre-season football game, the Redskins versus the Ravens, the Beltway Battle. The sports bar resembled a meat market; guys eyeing every woman who walked past and the women wearing scandalous attire in an effort to get a free drink and a phone number. The hostess led us to a booth inside the bar although there was outside seating, as well. I was glad because the sun hadn’t gone down yet and it was still hot outside.

  “What do you guys think about ordering appetizers to share?” I was hungry and wanted to try a few items on the menu.

  “Sounds good to me.” Vanessa responded as she focused on an attractive guy who I thought might’ve been a little too young for her.

  By halftime, Vanessa had a few too many Margaritas, and her words slurred a bit. “Is that John over there?”

  Tracy and I turned in the direction of Vanessa’s head nod. John and a nicely shaped woman with medium length hair were standing at the bar laughing, talking and enjoying the game.

  Just as I was about to turn around, John leaned his head back to take a sip of his Corona, and he caught me eyeing him.

  I wanted to disappear.

  I slid up out of our booth.

  “I’ll be right back; I’m going to the ladies room.” Making my way through the crowd, I sensed John moving behind me. Before I could grip the bathroom door, I heard his voice. “Lachelle, wait up.”

  “Hey? Where did you come from?”

  He grinned, and those perfect eyebrows raised up.

  “Okay, we saw you, and I
didn’t want you to see us seeing you.” I admitted.

  We both laughed.

  “How have you been? You look well.”

  “Thanks. Tracy was finally able to get me to come out for a few days; a staycation.”

  After a moment of awkward silence, he spoke. “I know that you are not looking for an explanation, but the woman I’m with is my ex-wife. We have a daughter, and when I come to town, we try to do something together so that when we’re with her, our friendship is real. It’s important to us that Hope knows we get along well, while we’re co-parenting.”

  John was right; he didn’t owe me any explanation. But, I was glad he provided one. Why did I feel a sense of relief? My husband died in May, and it was only August — I wasn’t looking for another relationship, and certainly not with John.

  But when I tried to smile, my lips wouldn’t move. I tried to blink away the fuzziness of John’s face. “Lachelle?”

  I heard him call my name, but even though he was right in front of me, he sounded miles away. I tried to blink again, but that made my head spin.

  “Lachelle?”

  John was farther away now. I felt dizzy, and the last thing I heard was John screaming. “Lachelle, what’s wrong?”

  There was nothing else after that.

  Chapter 18

  Loud voices woke me up. Tossing my head from side to side, I opened my eyes, but my vision was blurred. While rubbing my eyes, I noticed a strong smell of alcohol. When my vision cleared, I saw rails on a bed. Adrenaline raced through my body as I gripped them and sat up; I remembered falling.

  My baby!

  “Nurse. Nurse,” I screamed. A woman pulled the curtains back and entered. She came over to my bed.

  “Is my baby okay?”

  “Your baby is okay and so are you.” Her soft hand was the opposite of her demeanor. She raised my arm, and when she wrapped the sleeve around me to take my blood pressure, a rush of gratitude swept over me.

  “Don’t talk. You’re at the Southern Maryland Hospital. Your blood pressure increased to dangerous levels, but we were able to stabilize it.”